Everything I see isn't as real as it seems,
Some irony of the past, suddenly they're my dreams..
I try to remember, never able to find,
The trails, these memories, all I've left behind...
And suddenly when it all seems to start,
Why am I falling apart?
Every prophecy is aimless, sure do I know,
Re-appearing everywhere, don't know where to go..
Like footprints in the sand, endlessly they lead,
Unfulfilled dreams of the past, a buried deed...
And she deceives my senses like it was an art,
And suddenly I see myself falling apart...
Don't wanna feel a thing, just stay numb,
would do anything to break free, never to succumb...
My feelings feel suffocated, so does my mind,
A little fury aghast, everything left behind...
As eternal conquest fails, the self begins to shatter,
You want to pull out badly, but strength you cant gather...
Why all of a sudden does it feel so wrong?
Wrong answers of these questions, I've waited so long....
My pride is scattered, I feel my soul depart,
Why me?! Why am I, falling apart?
-Atul Haldankar
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It feels as though i'm re-living the few days i was living 3 years ago with the guy i met in college... everything you've spoken of is what i felt years back...just re-living those memories...its so beautiful ...running out of words to describe how deep and beautiful these thoughts of yours are...its out of the world atul...soo deep..
ReplyDeletethanks so much preeti..your comment matters here coz you've been there back then..Yes, truly, feels like re-living those days all over again..Im glad we met again though. :)
ReplyDelete"Why am I, falling apart?" you ask...
ReplyDeletemaybe cuz you let yourself. Time comes when you have to choose.. either to watch yourself "falling apart" or ask "she" to f*()k off.. and pull your socks up. All this feeling weeling zhatugiri won't get you anywhere, won't feed you, or your family, nor will your father-in-law. Even if you do get a rich pop-in-law ;).. he got rich, cuz he slogged for it.. and I think he'll expect the same outta your black ass.. so time to move on, and ask those people to get lost.
btw if this was meant to be a song or something.. well then its fine.. as long as you remember that Hallmark Card's quotations are written by a drunk man with a peg too many down his throat, trying to make a living by writing thrash to people who he doesn't know, for people he'll never bother to know.
ReplyDeletehad these absurd visions.....seemed like u voiced it....whoever u r....i'm sure u understand the power of words....or rather power of thot!
ReplyDeletecheers...
Thanks natasha..do you blog as well?..would like to see your work as well :-)
ReplyDeletecheers
Atul H